Dec 11, 2010

Blogging, Facebook & Social Media

I was blogging long before I knew there was a name for it. I started Horsetrailriders.com as a guide to horse trails in our state. The home page was kind of boring, so I would include horse stories or pictures from our rides or trails. When we took a horse trip to South Dakota in 2008, I started blogging as an easy way to chronicle the trip. Since I am the only one in my family (or extended family) who truly has a passion for all things horse, I continued to blog as a way to share my rides with my friends or others with the same interest. Occasionally, my youngest son will read my blog and look at my pictures, but others in my family have no interest. And that's okay. It's my deal.

Initially, I was real resistant to Facebook. It seemed quite intrusive into our everyday lives and sometimes I found myself embarrassed to be reading such personal things about others. And people who "vaguebook"? What is up with that? But slowly, I started to come around, keeping it generally horse related. Most of my Facebook friends are horse friends with a few family and extended family members sprinkled in. I have also reconnected with some high school friends that I regretfully lost touch with over the years. I keep my business life out of Facebook and will very seldom approve an associate from work. I will "high five" my kids occasionally on Facebook but I rarely share the day to day. My parents are both gone and my sister, brother and I communicate through phone calls or text, rarely through Facebook.

Last night, I took my youngest son and some buddies to a movie. After paying $32 for ticket prices, I took the boys up to the concession counter to get popcorn. A small tub of popcorn and a coke was $10 per child. I didn't deny the kids their treats and tweeted to my friends that after paying $30 for movie treats, I wonder how movies are affordable? The tweet was a bit tongue-in-cheek because those of us who have horses are constantly asked how can we afford horses? A fifty pound bag of horse feed is only $8 with a coupon so it seems like a bargain compared to popcorn! But a non-horse "friend" was quick to point out that if I didn't do things with my horse, I COULD afford a movie and I SHOULD enjoy this time with my kids, taking the whole post out of context.

To those who think I don't spend time with my kids because I am always riding my horse, I'll simply say this: You don't know me at all. Evidently this "friend" wrote the book on how to be a successful parent and believes that has warranted her right to judge. (I didn't know God was hiring for that position?) Admittedly, I struggle with parenting; I am not a natural. Knowing this, her comment was nothing but a cheap shot and I certainly don't appreciate being kicked while I am down. I don't think there has been a time in the last five years that I have missed my mom more: that unconditional support. I think her spirit was in the comments of my real friends who quickly had my back.

But ultimately, I have The Power.

The power to Unfriend.

And I used it.


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5 comments:

  1. You have more friends than you think! When the going gets tough, you find out who your real friends are. But well done, its not easy being a parent, I should know! I have 4, one of each!!!Lol! but seriously it isnt easy, and no one has the right to comment on others parenting skills. Keep blogging my friend.

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  2. Just another reason why I don't keep up with FB, although I do have an account. Blogging can be intrusive enough without having to add more insensitive comments to hurt my feelings, too.

    And if it matters, I'm impressed that you were able to go to the movie theater. I've not taken my kidlets to the theater in many years. With 3 kids and snacks, the total price can edge up close to a hundred bucks. ack!
    We get Netflix instead and make microwave popcorn. We're not missing anything by saving all that money.

    ~Lisa

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  3. Well, she is a cheerleader so what did you expect? ;)

    (Sorry, never can resist a cheerleader joke. That's going to bite me in the butt someday because my youngest is clearly a future cheerleader.)

    You know, we all make choices about what to do with our resources of money and time. Very rarely will any two people make the same choices. Even married people disagree on how to "spend" them. The different choices are what makes us interesting. Unless someone is hurting others (i.e. chronic gambling, affairs, etc.) in how they use their time and money I think we should just enjoy the variety.

    Sorry you got your feelings hurt. I hate when that happens.

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  4. (See, I told you Facebook would lead to no good. LOL )

    You are doing just FINE in the parenting department; I sure understand you wishing your mom was here to talk to, though. I wish she was, too.

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  5. You are a great writer too. Love how you ended that, that you unfriended her. Funny.

    Listen, I can totally relate. I'm the only one in my family (other than my younger daughter who I brainwashed well) who is horse crazy. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to vent to family and friends about the economy and work being slow and things being tough, like EVERYONE is going through, and some of them have said, basically, "Get rid of the horses." It makes me so mad. They don't UNDERSTAND. I don't tell THEM not to go out to dinner, or not to take a vacation, or to sell their boat. No, I wouldn't have horses if I couldn't pay my bills and dress my child and put food on the table, but I wouldn't sell them just so I could buy a bucket of overpriced popcorn!

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